Category Archives: Practical Things

Practical ideas, approaches and tools for a Rice and Beans Life

Are You Living Your Financial Life on Autopilot?

Posted on June 20, 2011 by Ms. Practicality

Are you living on autopilot?

I read a quote recently that really got my attention:

“Part of me wonders if our stories aren’t being stolen by the easy life.” – Donald Miller

It got me thinking. I’m a girl who uses technology when it’s truly making my life better-not necessarily just easier. I’ve come to the conclusion that easier can sometimes be overrated. Sometimes easier can draw down our base of knowledge and ability. It can even lull our sense of personal accountability. Sometimes easier-or convenience-takes away our need to think and that’s not always a good thing.

When you stop thinking about something, especially an important thing like your personal finances, it can lead to some not so great results. I ran out of check registers a while back (you know-those little ledgers that you use to balance a checkbook) and dropped by my credit union to ask for some extras. The teller looked at me and nearly laughed. She said “Sure!!! Have as many as you need! It’s too bad more people don’t use ’em!” I told her I was a bit of a nerd with our finances (as in Nerd vs Free Spirit ala Dave Ramsey) and that I felt the need to know where every penny was. She went on to tell me that she was pretty sure that most people didn’t bother to do that anymore, shaking her head sadly. I remember being surprised by this. I later mentioned the conversation to a friend who uses tech pretty heavily for bills and finances and she said-I don’t balance to the penny either. I said you don’t know how much is actually in your balance? She said “nope.” I said “Huh.”

In the last couple of years we’ve seen so many struggle in our current economy. I’ve read article after article and seen newscast after newscast about how to cut the household budget and which particular items to stop spending on. I’ve read about all the “things” to fix or cut out. I have not seen enough about the what else might be causing some of these problems in the first place. So I have some advice to consider:

Un-automate your life and stop living on autopilot.

I’m not saying to stop using technology if it’s working for you to make life easier and better. But if it’s just making life more convenient in a way that keeps you from thinking about your finances, your expenditures, what you are using, buying or doing right now and about whether it’s a good fit for your life-then it’s time to consider getting off of autopilot. Living on autopilot can leave you moving comfortably along assuming things are just fine and that the coast is clear when sometimes it’s not. It can cause you to fall asleep at the wheel of your financial life. It can rob you of your sense of how to solve challenges as they pop up. It can cause you to notice problems only when alarm bells and red warning lights are going off in the cockpit of your financial life which means something is dramatically wrong. Right NOW. Autopilot behavior and over-automating finances can cause important missed opportunities to make sure you are staying on track and avoid the alarm bells and red flashing warning lights that can cause panic and emergency mode. Living on autopilot is a lot like making the choice to not continue to make important choices as they come up. It’s making the choice to coast along. Whether we like it or not, life moves and changes, often at a more rapid pace than can be comfortable. It’s easy to want convenience. But when life is on autopilot we might just be missing the chance to make the effective changes to correct our course when it needs correcting. So if you’ve been living on autopilot and have an overly automated financial life, maybe it’s time to review whether it’s actually easier and better. If it’s not, consider un-automating some of your life and turning off the autopilot.

Are you on autopilot? Do you feel it’s an easier and better thing for your life? Has convenience caused you to not see where changes need to made? I’d love to see your comments on whether your easier is also your better!

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On Father’s Day: Simple is Good-Even with Love

Posted on June 19, 2011 by Ms. Practicality

I don’t usually write on Sundays. For me it’s a day with my family and a day for spiritual reflection. But today I am far away from my dad and I miss him. We live too far apart, he and I. Because my husband and I spent many years in the military life and, after the fact, found a job closer to, yet still two states away from our family, we’ve been far away “home” for almost ten years now. So today, being Father’s Day, I am, understandably thinking about my Dad.

You see, I’m particularly lucky. My Dad chose me to be his daughter and my twin brothers to be his sons when I was not quite six and they were only four. He was nearly thirty years old at the time and traded in bachelorhood for an insta-family that came with one headstrong little girl. I cannot say I made it easy on him. But he loved me anyway. He still does. And my memories of him are simple and meaningful ones. I remember watching him color in giant coloring books with my brothers on a coffee table in the house we lived in with my mother before they were married. And I remember him teaching me how to shoot a .22 rifle at a target-being amazed that a right handed girl was a left handed shot and pretty darn good at it. He called me Annie Oakley. I remember him working long hard hours on a ranch and being a volunteer firefighter. And how he knew everyone in town, it seemed. It was a rare thing to meet someone who didn’t know my dad or who didn’t like him. When I describe my dad to people who have never met him I often say…well…he’s kind of like the Andy Taylor (from the Andy Griffith Show) of our small town. But there are two memories that stand out for me in vivid brilliant technicolor in my mind. They are brief and telling about my Dad and his love for me.

The first is when I was in junior high school. I was a pudgy kid and only started to grow out of it somewhere around the seventh or eighth grade. I never felt particularly pretty. I was most certainly one of the nerds or dorks-you know-good grades, very shy, not very coordinated and definitely not popular. But I was a nice kid. A good kid. I had a good heart. One day, and I cannot recall at all the reason why, my Dad picked me up from school when I usually walked home. It was uncharacteristic of me to confide in my Dad about such things but I mentioned to him how I wished I could wear makeup like some of the other girls. It was the 80’s and blue eyeliner was very popular at the time. And pink lipstick. My Dad looked at me thoughtfully for a moment. I remember him turning his eyes back to the road as he pulled away from the curb. I half expected him to tell me I was silly or remind me I wasn’t old enough yet in our house to wear make up. But he did neither. He said, “You know. The thing is-it’s girls who like all that color, which is fine. But boys don’t like that clown makeup. Boys like girls who look natural and like themselves.” And he just kept driving. That was all he said. But it was powerful stuff to an adolescent girl who was starting to like boys and starting to try and figure out her place in the world. It stuck with me and became a powerful part of who I am and what I still see in the mirror.

Many years later I was married. I did not marry young. I was past thirty when I had my first child. My parents had taken time off to come and be with me near my due date for my first child because my husband was deployed to Iraq for a full year. My son was born very near to Christmas-time and while I am a strong, strong woman, I was standing in my kitchen holding a days-old infant when a song came on the radio that suddenly became the final emotional straw for me. I broke. I stood there at the kitchen sink quietly crying as I missed my husband and grieved that he was not with us for our first child’s birth or for this baby’s first Christmas. I did not want anyone to feel sorry for me so I cried quietly. My Dad had come into the small kitchen and he saw me there crying. He said nothing to me. He stood a moment and then, saying nothing at all, my mostly undemonstrative Dad put his arms around me and my baby and hugged us to him in a way that said all that needed saying. When I stopped crying my dad kissed the top of my head and walked away. We never talked about it. It was just something that simply…was.

And that is my Dad. His love is simple and genuine. Sometimes he does things that can drive me bananas. As I’m sure I do for him. But I have no doubt that my Dad loves me. He may not say it often, but he shows it in simple, emotionally economical ways that leave no question. So while there are Dads out there that are fancier and more eloquent than my Dad, I learned what simple and honest love is from him. I’m lucky. My Dad chose me when I was nearly six. And it made all the difference in my world.

Thank you Dad. I love you.

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Do You Read the Box? A Tip on Finding…Tips!

Posted on June 15, 2011 by Ms. Practicality

As a kid, I remember sitting at the table early in the morning before school reading the cereal box as I munched on my breakfast before heading out for the day. Over and over again. To make sure I’d read all the words on it (Yep. I’m a reader.). Even the ingredients that I often could not pronounce (and if I were still eating some of those cereals it’s likely I still couldn’t pronounce some of those ingredients!). As I’ve gotten older, and truthfully, since I’ve become a mom, I’ve had a lot less time to read the box. I do scan the ingredient list when I’m in the grocery store. I’m pretty careful about making sure we try to keep things simple and healthful (while we don’t actually use too many prepared foods-I do manage to check the lists on what we do buy). But the other day I found myself with some quiet time while I was making a batch of waffles (I’ll post about my batches of waffles later-I promise!). I found myself reading the back of the Clabber Girl Baking Powder Can. There was a recipe for biscuits. I found myself thinking it was probably a darn good one. Biscuits are the one thing that I never managed to master that my grandma could do with her eyes closed (it was hard to get it just right when she had the art down to a “handful of this and a pinch of that”, I suppose). I haven’t tried it yet, but it occurred to me that if it’s on the back of the Clabber Girl can it might just be worth trying. As I put away the tin of baking powder I curiously pulled down my Arm & Hammer baking soda box to see what was on that one. I’ve been using baking soda for all kinds of things for quite some time. I make cleaning products for my home using it. I’ve had giant boxes of it in my possession. But I hadn’t really read the box. Now looking it over I saw a list of uses for it I hadn’t noticed before: Relaxing bath. Fuller, more manageable hair. Invigorating yet gentle facial exfoliant. I scratched my head thinking “really?” Cool! Very curious now, I pulled out my giant bottle of white vinegar. I use vinegar all over the house too. I clean windows with it. It’s one of the ingredients in my homemade all-purpose cleaning spray in my kitchen. I use it in my laundry. I found a tip for marinating beef and for keeping cut fruit from darkening. Wow. I’ve read long lists of vinegar use tips but hadn’t seen these before. So the next time you have a few extra seconds with that box or bottle in your hands-even if it’s something you’ve used a hundred and one times-take a look at it. You might find a great new practical tip you hadn’t found before!

Check the back of the box-you might find some great tips there!

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What the Heck Ever Happened to Home Ec? (And My Goal for the Year)

Posted on June 14, 2011 by Ms. Practicality

I’d been thinking about this for a for the last few days when, on Friday evening I happened to run across Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution show on ABC. He was in the midst of helping a single father of two boys understand why and how living on fast food wasn’t actually easier or cost-effective and how it was hurting their health and their future. I was fascinated to watch Jamie challenge this Dad to go get what he usually gets at a fast food joint while Jamie and the boys stayed home and made a meal from scratch. Dad came home to find the boys and Jamie Oliver tossing a pigskin in the street thinking he’d saved the day with getting a meal so quickly (it actually took 45 minutes!). He soon realized that not only had dinner been on the table for a bit waiting for his arrival, but the boys, who I believe were adolescent aged, had cooked the entire meal themselves with only direction from Jamie. And it had cost significantly less than what Dad had brought home half-cold and soaked in grease.

I was thinking to myself EXACTLY! And then I had a thought: What the heck ever happened to Home Ec?

When my husband and I were married, and honestly up until I had a pregnancy were I couldn’t eat let alone cook for the first 4 months, he could do little more than make a sandwich, grill a piece of meat and pour himself some cereal. He’d never learned to cook. When we got married, I knew the basics from having watched my mom and my grandmother. Mostly though, along the way, I taught myself. In fact, in our house, it’s commonly said: If it doesn’t work out, we order pizza. So far we’ve never had to order pizza. But what has happened to us all that we not only believe we can’t cook, but that we believe that cooking is hard and expensive or time intensive? It doesn’t have to be any of those things!

I’ve also often been astounded by the fact that so many people I know cannot sew on a button or balance a checkbook. I find myself scratching my head often over the fact that our students can all relate to “A train leaves Chicago at 6pm going 100 miles per hour and another train leaves St. Louis at 5:45 pm traveling at 110 miles per hour…” you get the idea. And yet we struggle with the basics of how to take care of ourselves and our homes. I have to wonder, if we learn the simple things of self-sufficiency at home, wouldn’t it create a better base from which our children can confidently go forth into the world to build upon those basic skills knowing that, at the very least they can care for themselves?

In our house we homeschool. I’m sure plenty of people think we are a little off the beaten path and a tad strange. That’s ok. But even if we didn’t homeschool we’d be teaching our boys how to care for themselves and handle the basics. When they head off to college years from now I want them to know how to cook something other than Top Ramen (even if they choose not to).I know we live in an age of ever increasing technology and speed, but the simple fact of the matter is, we need to know how to take care of ourselves in a way that is healthful in order to be of much use out in the world. It’s a matter of learning simple self reliance and personal responsibility.

So, if you have children, and you haven’t already done so, or if you know a child who may not be learning the basics: help them learn. If you don’t know how yourself, start learning. It’s never too early or too late to learn to boil an egg, to sew a button, to balance the checkbook, to wash a load of laundry properly….to simply care well for ourselves. If you can read this post, you can certainly figure out how to do any of these things. Or in this day of technology do what I’ve been often been known to do: Youtube it! But for heaven’s sake give learning some basics a chance. You might be surprised at how knowing some basics, or learning ones you haven’t learned yet can make you feel accomplished and able to face the world. At the very least, you’ll be fed well, your button will be on your pants and maybe, just maybe you might even have your pants hemmed to the right length and your checkbook balanced. My personal goal for the year: Learn to change a tire. Simply because I don’t know how (I know this actually falls under Automotive and not Home Economics-but it’s a matter of self-sufficiency so I’m including it here!)

So readers, were you taught the basics or are there plenty you are still learning? Are you teaching these things to your kids?

 

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Monumental Outcomes: Doing It the Old Fashioned Way

Posted on June 10, 2011 by Ms. Practicality

I watched a news article today about a woman who lost 300 lbs the “old fashioned” way. She knew that where she was, at 500+ lbs. was killing her. So she made a decision to change. She got brave and went into a world she’d pretty much stayed out of. She stepped into a gym. She did what she knew she needed to do: she got started. As I watched this brave woman being interviewed, I noticed that she commented on this fact: There are no gimmicks. No short cuts. It’s hard work. It’s worth it.

Living a simpler yet richer life and making better choices for ourselves is not, at first, a simple thing to do. It takes a decision and stick-to-it-iveness. There are always excuses and self doubt that come with it. There are always reasons. The most popular one I hear is often “I don’t have time” or “it’s too hard-I can’t do it.” I love the one that people often give about “you can’t take it with you when you die!” Giving ourselves an out short changes the possibilities of what can be. If only you changed your mind. No one can do this for you except you. And no one can do the hard work for you. The great thing about this is the reward your reap for your hard won success will be truly yours. You will know it in your heart. As you live a better life for yourself, you often find a way to start living in a way that shares good things with the world.

I also, recently, found a blog about a family that is traveling. They have lived all over the place with their family of seven. There are five children including an infant. Now while this life style isn’t something that would be my dream or something I’d want for my family, I find it inspiring that these people found the things that were in their way. They found what was holding them back. They made a choice to start. They systematically eliminated what was in the way and found a way to live their dream. They are taking their children around the world and showing how amazing this world is. It’s unconventional, sure. But it’s inspiring to see someone else living “their dream.” They aren’t all that different from you or me. They just made a decision to start. Little by little they’ve made their way to living a life they love. And they are inspiring people with their journey by blogging about it.

No one will tell you that making good changes in your life is easy. No one will tell you that success isn’t hard won. But for those who are walking this road of making quality changes in their lives by making the decision to just START will tell you how worth it it really is. Making quality changes doesn’t have to be a monumental event. Start simple. It can lead to monumental outcomes. You just have to make the decision to get started.

If you have time check out:

Story about Shannon Davis-Weight Loss

The Denning Family at DiscoverShareInspire

 

The Denning Family Interview at ManVs.Debt

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Do you DIY? 7 Questions to Ask Yourself First

Posted on June 8, 2011 by Ms. Practicality

I’ll admit it. Back when I had cable, I was seriously addicted to any channel that smacked of Do It Yourself kinds of projects. I loved This Old House. I loved TLC’s Design on a Dime. I loved HGTV. I was very fond of anything fix it associated with the home. It was so easy and natural to assume that what they made look so simple actually was! And being practical minded, who wouldn’t want to have some great stuff on the cheap?

I remember my first DIY project: to spruce up an old dresser in the white Shabby Chic style that was popular at the time. Did it go well? Well. It’s still white. But looking back on it, no. Not particularly. I learned pretty quickly how miserable hand sanding an old dresser can be in an Alabama summer (since that’s where we lived at the time) and how humidity can make paint take days and days to dry. Not to mention the “kit” I bought to make it easier on myself was, as I’ve learned all these years later, basically junk. Flat paint on any furniture is not a good idea. Later we bought a home in Tennessee knowing we’d need to pull down ugly wallpaper and paint some of the rooms. The Design on a Dime crew made it all looks so easy. I could do that! And of course, our realtor enforced this with the “it’s only cosmetic” mantra I’ve heard many realtors espouse. We loved our house. We really did. But by the time I was on the third room of hideous wallpaper,and had made several trips to the store I was really sick of DIY’ing and we still had to prime and paint!!

Now you may be curious. Does she still DIY? Yep. I still do. I’m happy to say that I’ve come a long, long way in my expectations and my approach to DIY projects and I’ve gained a great sense of humor about it. I’ve learned to ask myself a few things before I begin the process:

1.) Do I have the patience to see this through? (in other words, the cool factor of the item in question)

2.) Will it really save me money?

3.) Can I find this already made for about what I’d spend to make it?

4.) Am I willing to invest in the tools and supplies if I don’t already have them? Can I even find them locally? (or does this use some obscure item that can’t be substituted easily?)

5.) Have I done enough research to be reasonably sure I’m going to make only one, maybe two trips to the hardware store?

6.) Am I ok with this occupying my garage if it takes longer than I expect (which it almost always does)?

7.) Am I willing to laugh at this experience if and when I come up against something goofy about it or if it plain old doesn’t work out?

I’ve done a few great DIY projects in the last couple of years. My favorite was not actually a piece of furniture or painting a room but actually fixing an old riding lawn mower we’d purchased used that was a must have for our home in Tennessee. My husband was gone on a military deployment and I had an infant. And I needed to keep my grass cut. It took a lot of patience and about two weeks (which is an eternity for the lawn going un-mowed in a wet Tennessee summer) since I only worked on it during nap time. I’m happy to report that it was a great and practical success and cost me less than $10. I was actually sad when I ended up selling it with the house for an extra couple hundred dollars a few years later. But it gave me some serious confidence in my resourcefulness. And it taught me that DIY’s can be great, practical and save money too. You just have to be aware that it may not go as fast or as easily as you expect. And you have to be willing to laugh along the way.

So dear readers, do you DIY? Why or why not?

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The trouble with fast and easy

Posted on June 7, 2011 by Ms. Practicality

We are an instant gratification society. We want it now. We want it fast. We want it easy. But this isn’t always very practical or healthy. Recently, my son was impatiently wanting a movie to play before the DVD player even had time to get the disc into the machine. I tried to explain that when I was a little girl we didn’t even have a VCR and that we had to wait for movies like Mary Poppins and The Wizard of Oz to come on once a year on regular TV. This of course, led to a look of bafflement and pity from his sweet little face. He got really thoughtful. I happily thought that I really must have helped him understand the need for patience. Then he frowned and said, “but Mom, what’s a V-C-R?” Good grief. The point, of course, that I was trying to make with my five year old is that not everything can or should happen instantaneously. The best things take time, effort, and commitment. Whether it’s cooking a decent healthy meal (which really can happen in 30 minutes but often not in 10), making a new friend,  learning to do a new thing (like getting your budget written and working for you), finally and completely getting out of debt (it’s taken us more years than I like to admit but we’re ALMOST there!) or waiting for that favorite movie to load into the machine. We have come to expect things worth having to come easily. We throw in the towel too quickly when something doesn’t give us results as fast as we think we should be getting them. As technology drives us faster and faster, we think those results should be coming at an even more rapid clip. But things that happen too fast and too easily often don’t hold our hearts or give us a sense of accomplishment or gratitude. Things that stick with you take work and take time. As a favorite singer of mine says, “if it all just happened overnight, we wouldn’t know how much it means.” If you’re trying to make some positive and practical changes in your life and your struggling with it because it’s not happening quickly, whether it’s trying to be a little healthier in the kitchen or with your wallet, or any other endevour that’s pulling your heart, take your time. Keep putting one foot in front of the other. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. But it also ends at the END of the thousandth mile. If you stop on step three, you only have a journey of three whole steps. Keep going. Whatever it is, all those steps will make it well worth it and it will hold your heart all the more for it.

So, what goals are you impatiently struggling with today? What helps you stay the course?

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